The British Homemaker - One day at a time

What? It’s October? Sheesh! Who moved September then? Is that how you feel to? I think the whole of 2012  has whizzed by. I’m sure it was only last week we were about to sign for the keys for this house, enjoy a stress free Christmas {probably the only one ever !} and looking forward to re-creating a home for us all again. Now, as I plan for Halloween and Christmas I can’t help but cast my mind back to the wonderful things that have happened this year. I know this is a pre-mature kinda post but bare with me, all will be revealed... * January saw us in our new home, hardly able to believe we were on the way to becoming settled again. It also saw us ill {3 weeks for me!} There is nothing in the world that prepares you for being homeless, no matter how it comes about, but more than that, nothing prepares you for the time you know you can lay your hat again and allow the inside unfold...it took quite a while for us all to deal with th...

I’ve always said to my kids, don’t just leave home, plan it and I can help you. Well that was changed on my oldest sons part, he went for a visit one day and didn’t come home! We laugh about it now but he’s settled with his girls and his fiancé and all has come exceptionally well for them. No matter how many times I look at Jay, I can’t help but feel proud of the person he’s become. When Scott left it was appropriate timing after my marriage ended, since then he’s completed college and university and about to move into his own place nearby, so I’m now on the look out for some good furniture for him even if I have to do it up first. He has it together impressively well. I totally love the man my Scott has become. Now I’m determined that at least one of my 4 kids will leave home with some input and planning from me! I just always wanted to share that experience with them and Kirsten is the one that is more like me, plan, plan and more plan. While she has her l...

This year is the end of 2 era’s in my life, both concerning my kids. It’s also the end of my Scott’s 3 years at university...and I don’t mind saying it’s all very emotional for me. Kirsten left school the day after she turned 16 (June) and is now eagerly awaiting September to move onto college. She is so fired up about it, having chosen her subjects, seen how it will take her into the career she so badly wants (midwife) and how she will no longer have to deal with subjects that bore her senseless (science and P.E). I’m not sure how we got to this point, it was only 5 mintues ago I was attending her primary school leaving assembly, again wondering how we’d gotten to that point too! After how the last year has been for her, I stand all amazed at how she has not only gained momentum on life itself but leapt so far forward with her education that even her tutors didn’t want her to leave! Proud mommy here. ...

Meet Lillie-Mai… Who came into the world on Thursday 5th April 2012 @ 2.28am weighing a whopping 9lb 11oz! A younger sister to the funny Bailey Boo… Who loves her baby sister soooo much! But she sleeps. and sleeps. and sleeps. For now!

12 years ago today my older boys and I were baptised. I don’t believe I’ve ever made a better choice aside from having my children. Let me take you back… A little over 13 years ago my lifelong friend died suddenly in a motorbike accident. Mark was 33, father to two and husband to 1. Mark and I had a bond that was more than partners, more than best friends, more than brother and sister, yet was never confused or complicated with crossing ‘the line’ {you know what I mean there, right?} Mark was a man of presence, one of humour and strength. His life had been full of good, bad and all in between. When he died he wasn’t talking to me! I was ok with that though, he was sulking because someone else had fixed my computer and I hadn’t called on him…I’ve always laughed at that because I knew how our friendship was. I know how much I meant to him and I know we are eternal friends. I won’t go into how I learned of his death, it was rather traumatic but I will say it took me 5 years t...

I stopped falling into that trap a long time ago. Instead I tend to spend some time just thinking about the last year and what I’ve learned from it, where it took me {and my kids} and pick out the parts we need to fix, build on or change and make them a part of the new year. The things that have gone well for us we either keep doing or take them further..whichever the case is. This  year I’m not too clear on where I want to take The British Homemaker . I love my business, the variety I offer in all things homemaking, sewing and baking as well as recycling and eco living, but we didn’t have a typical 2011 and I am beginning to see how severely my kids were affected. They are happy and positive but they have lost faith in me. I am the one parent who has always managed to save them from that hard fall except this time. They are trying hard to believe me when I say it’s all going to work out and we can get through anything after that stint. Yet I still see they are doubtful. I...

No matter how many times I walk round the house or look at my tenancy agreement It just doesn’t sink in that we are no longer in the homeless system. I find myself staring into the air thinking back over the last 8 months. Tears will easily and unexpectedly visit when I am happy just washing up or making a bed. My heart is heavy with gratitude, my mind is full of ideas and my life is full of a more certain future for my kids as well as myself. As Dorothy said: There’s no place like home

On Thursday afternoon I had a home visit from a housing association who were considering me for a house about 10 miles away. I think I was more optimistic because it meant I was not lost in the system and someone had finally noticed us. The interview went well, even a few laughs and I was told a decision would be made the next morning. Throughout the day my Facebook friends streamed comments, messages and texts of support and prayers. I was so humbled it moved me to tears. Even after my own prayers I knew it was going to be ok. There was a part of me that felt this house would be offered to me, but I couldn’t get too far ahead of myself. Yesterday morning I actually missed the call. When I realised the agent had called my spare phone I learnt that I had, indeed been offered the house! Charley almost broke his ankle as he kicked the air and hit the table instead and as it came down he promptly sent my drink flying over the room! But who cares, right? We are no longer homeless!!...

I love the hymns we have available to us, I love to flick through the book and sing away {did I already mention that I am tone deaf and can’t sing for toffee?}. This time of the year I find I listen to them more, I make up my own cd and play it till its worn out, my kids are not always amused either because it takes away their choice of what goes in their ears but they end up singing or humming along, win-win I say! This year I find myself  humming this one below, I don’t know all the words but I’m pretty sure I will by the end of the year! 1. Joy to the world, the Lord is come; Let earth receive her King! Let ev’ry heart prepare him room, And Saints and angels sing, And Saints and angels sing, And Saints, and Saints and angels sing. 2. Rejoice! Rejoice when Jesus reigns, And Saints their songs employ, While fields and floods, rocks, hills, and plains Repeat the sounding joy, Repeat the sounding joy, Repeat, r...

Being homeless has many levels of meaning and circumstances. After two stints I do not believe it is something to be taken lightly. I have seen people around me this last two weeks who walk round this hotel looking like they have the world on their shoulders. There is no typical person to fall prey to the situation either. I chat with a couple of people who have obviously had the daylights knocked out of them primarily because of a relationship breakdown of some form and through mean and sometimes spiteful choices they can’t control and are out on the streets whilst their partners are in the home…the shocking thing is the people I am referring to are mothers with young children. It breaks my heart that my kids are going through this again, through no fault of theirs or mine but to see a 2 and 4 year old come out of the bathroom freshly bathed and in their pjs I wonder what effect it will have on them in the future. I look at the mom, say hi and stop to chat for a few minutes and I de...

I am not the typical homeless person because I have some very caring friends and a good supportive mother who sees me through what I need. However, there are a few things I’ve come to realise about not having your own home: Your routine and comfort zones no longer exist, no matter how hard you try. You spend more than you would running a house. Mentally you are always aware of someone else around you in a very different way, not always in a good way. Your friends jump on board with you and keep you going, the most important way is emotionally. Suddenly mopping floors and cleaning baths become a dream. Dodging traffic wardens becomes a new hobby. En suite becomes a multi use room: shower, wash, wash up, change. Going to the bathroom in the middle of the night {because its down the hall} becomes a mini trip…door key, light, loo roll. Everyone seems to need your address, only when you don’t have one to give they have that ‘look’ in...

The last time I posted here I was in the middle of moving house. This time I post and I’m living with my mom! So what’s the deal? It hasn’t been an easy few weeks but it is by far the worst too. The day I moved from the house the one I thought I was moving to fell through. That left us, once again wondering where we were going to drive off to once we were in the car! De je Vous? For sure! Thankfully my mom came to the rescue and invited us to stay with her till I secured something else. I also hit other obstacles, the kids school, my work and the group I was involved with for the course I’ve not long graduated with. What I didn’t know is how much my life was about to change. For the next three weeks I found that I was kind of lost. So many hours to fill and nothing to fill them with. I helped with the housework, I read, I set my computer up, I read the scriptures but it was very unnerving for me to not have school runs, my own routine, some privacy and toys all over the place...

This house move has become a nightmare. Last week I went on complete emotional meltdown and all but give up on the whole deal. I haven’t cried so much in years, as one door closed two more slammed. By Sunday I had lost all hope that God even knew I existed, much less cared so I went into church after sacrament to speak to my branch president. For me to miss church there has to be a good reason, this week, I just couldn’t feel it. {I also had ear-ache through the night but it wouldn’t have stopped me going if I could just get my mind/heart in some hopeful place}. Three hours later I walked out of his office feeling worse than before but more in control of myself. I say worse because while I was in there many things were covered that I hadn’t mentally processed. It’s always good to have another persons opinion. Later that afternoon I sent a message to my two fellow admin on my Facebook group offering to resign from my status. Long shot of it was, Alex called me to cheer me on and gen...

There are 3 things I particularly hate in life: 1. Ironing 2. Cutting grass 3. Moving house However, I make peace with the first two every now and again by promising myself a reward. Moving house, however is not that easy. There’s always a lull before the storm no matter how organised I think I am. My lull either isn’t here yet or it’s in the hands of my Heavenly Father because this time round I am totally relaxed about the prospect of packing up this house, all 11 rooms and a garage that hides a bazillion boxes of junk. In fact, the more I think about moving the more excited I feel. I have the whole project planned out to the finest detail, I have offers of help for packing, meals, moving, unpacking, more meals and even a ‘get out of jail free’ card (girls movie night out) to recharge before the unpacking starts again. Based on the other 676 thousand times I’ve moved house I am determined this time is going to be different (yep, I’ve said that about 675 times before!) beca...

A couple of months ago the Relief Society and Young Women sang in sacrament. The chosen song, Lighthouse in the night, is  a young woman song but when you listen to the words they are so powerful and uplifting I dare anyone not to raise a tear. As a mother of a teenage daughter, my heart aches that she no longer comes to church with me. I allow her the free agency her Father in Heaven gave her and while she still lives many of the principles she’s been taught and isn’t against the church or doctrine, I do worry that she is missing out on the wonderful messages that young women her age so need in this world. This song was sang where the RS sang to the YW then the YW sang the chorus…in confirmation of them knowing who they are, why they are here and just how precious they really are. Take a listen…..you wont regret it…but just go grab a tissue or ten first!  

There are certain times of the  year that just don’t ‘do’ it for me. I mean, some events are just fun for the day but the day after it’s all over with, such as Valentine’s day, Pancake day etc. We {the kids and I} make novelty things to decorate the table, we have fun foods symbolising the theme etc but I can’t say I get super excited about them. However, Easter is my ultimate favourite celebration of the year. I.Love.Easter! For the last 2 years I have done a scripture chase with my kids lasting approx 3-4 hours each. In between each scripture they’d get a clue for a hidden egg, small gift and a scripture they had to learn and tell back to me as well as what their understanding of it was. The first year we done this we watched a range of Lds childrens scripture cartoons in between and/or some talk from the General Conference. No matter how many times I hear Elder Jeffrey R Holland’s talk, I am consumed with emotions. Shame, love, humility, gratitude and a deeper ...

After doing the majority of refunds on Saturday I was getting confused why the total amount wasn’t going down. It wasn’t till I checked my email that I found that the donations/sponsorship money was being returned back to me! The over all decision was that I was being urged to keep hold of the money and use it to donate to any charity I chose. I was very touched and very humbled. 18 lovely people left messages of support and apologies for the breakdown of this event. Previously it was friends that called to ask what happened but soon I didn’t want to get into it, the attitude was not productive. My Facebook friends are the ones that reminded me that all is not lost and there is still something I can do, just without the drama and abuse from Daisy’s mum. So I’m going to spend a few days thinking out what the next move can be and who the money’s shall be going to. Thank you so, so much for your generosity, I underestimated the readership here, my friends and business contacts s...

How many times do you hear that word? How many times does that word apply to you? I think it applies to almost everyone (at least who I know) but it definitely applies to me, and I reluctantly admit that! Through Sunday’s church meeting we talked about sacrifice, temperance and patience. By the time I got home I realised that the other events that occurred during the meetings that frustrated me was the perfect example of my lack of sacrifice, temperance and patience. You see, I was released in my calling as Branch Activities Chairperson and was called as Relief Society Teacher. Again. Now back in the day I loved this calling, both times I was called. I loved that I got to know the sisters that little bit better, I got the perfect opportunity to learn more than I could teach and I loved that I was part of a pro-active Relief Society. I also loved that by working on a lesson I was able to get closer to my Heavenly Father and  understand Him so much more. Then why does this ca...